


Life Goes On

by flyingfishflops



Category: jacksepticeye
Genre: Gen, Grief/Mourning, I don't really think Chase is okay, Implied Anti, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempt, Jack Is In A Coma, Post The Doctor is Back, Return of Scneeplestine, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-24
Updated: 2018-05-24
Packaged: 2019-05-13 08:30:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14745422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flyingfishflops/pseuds/flyingfishflops
Summary: After August 2017, the egos numbers are down one. They struggle through, never knowing what happened, presuming him dead. They're coping though.Sort of.





	Life Goes On

**Author's Note:**

> The latest Egopocolipse has been messing me up. I just had to write something for it.

Jackie liked to think they were doing quite well, considering. Not good, no, and certainly not great, but alright. Life went on after all. It had to. They’d never be great again, he knew; but nine months on and they were surviving. 

 

So maybe gentle sobs sometimes echoed out of, and whiskey disappeared into Chase’s room at night. Perhaps some days Marvin did go quiet and sullen, speaking to no one and tracing old scars like a map through memories of well meaning lectures about being more careful. What of it, if Jackie himself was pushing himself to the limits each night he went out to protect others, coming back more broken than ever? They were still alive. They were rebuilding some semblance of a life, regardless of how unsteady it was.

 

They’d found his licence one day, when they’d managed to gather the strength to clean out his room. It was crumpled and torn, stuffed angrily in a draw in a fit of hopelessness. Jackie still remembered how Marvin’s fingers had dug into his arm, almost drawing blood as Chase had tenderly lifted it out the draw, showing them with the same lost expression he’d been wearing for god knows how long. They’d carried the sad, broken thing into the commons and painstakingly repaired it. A frame was found, and it was hung up on the wall like a priceless artifact in a museum. Through unspoken agreement, the spot below it became a sort of shrine as various photos and objects belonging to him were placed under it. No one had tried cleaning his room after that.

* * *

 

Then the new guy came. Dapper, as they all called him at first, was met with a mixture of suspicion and fear. He’d shown up on halloween, silently moving through the house looking for someone, until he’d found Chase in the kitchen, who’d jumped a mile high and dropped his glass when he’d turned around to find a stranger there. However, after weeks of coexistence, and a little bit of undercover observation thanks to Marvin, Jameson Jackson- as his name turned out to be- was gradually accepted into their fold. It was nice to have a fourth in the house again, even if in his darker moments, Jackie felt like he was betraying his friend. Still, Jameson’s arrival proved to be a welcome distraction. Jameson was easy to get on with, once the initial communication barrier had been overcome, and was a great listener who was always there when it all became too much for any of them. He himself rarely caused trouble either, which was a nice change of pace. Jackie would be the first to admit that he and his fellow Egos tended to be pretty chaotic. 

 

In fact, the only real trouble he’d been involved in was the incident where Jackie had to physically restrain Chase after Jameson had, unknowingly, tried sitting in  _ his _ chair. Later, when Chase had calmed down and retreated to his room, Jackie explained the best he could, about who was missing from their lives, and their lives’ unstable foundations. The younger ego had nodded, understanding, with a sad look in his eyes. He’d told Jackie that he wished he could have met him, and the hero had to agree. A muffled sob had come from Chase’s room, and Jameson had looked at Jackie with so much concern and had asked if he was feeling okay after holding Chase back. Jackie had just shrugged, and told him it wasn’t the first time he’d had to do that, though it was rarely for the safety of the others. There was a reason that no guns or knives could be found in the house.

  
  


So they’d settled into a life of empty chairs and extra places at the table. Of red eyes in the morning, empty bottles at night and a shrine on the wall. They built their life on pillars, carefully carved with the avoidance of names and dates. And then when they came crashing down to the steady beat of a heart monitor, together, they solomley rebuilt again, adding one more pillar to their lives- this time formed of periodic visits, and one sided conversations that may not have been heard. And they settled into it. They were doing quite well, considering. They were happy enough, considering. They were stable enough, considering. Considering.

 

Considering so many things. So, so many, that none of that really meant much at all.

* * *

 

They were sat in the commons, not in silence so much as in a shared quiet. By the fire, JJ snoozed, soft and silent, in an armchair that had appeared not long after the ‘chair Incident’ as it was only ever referred to. Chase lounged on the couch, headphones on as he watched something on his laptop, leaning slightly against Jackie. A small way off, small pops and groans came from Marvin as he tried to perfect some new spell or another. Jackie would look up from his comic book to give him a small smile, or some encouraging words. It was peaceful and intimate, a state that  the egos had learnt to treasure during the last few months.

 

The sound of the front door opening shook the tranquility from the air like a tremor preceding an eruption, though the room stayed just as quiet. Now however, the silence had a sinister air to it. Jackie froze, glancing over to Marvin who had the same horrified expression on his face. He hadn’t imagined it then. Shit. 

“Chase” he hissed. “Chase.” Jackie tapped his friend’s shoulder, holding a finger to his lips. Chase slowly took of his headphones and gave him a questioning look. “Someone just came in” His eyes widened in fear for a moment, and he stood up, glancing around the room for the closest thing to a weapon he could find. Fingers closing around a cane belonging to Jameson, he gripped it tight and moved soundlessly to the door, beconing for the others to follow. Marvin snapped his fingers and a small flame flickered in his palm, ready to be weaponized at a moments notice, while Jackie simply balled his fists, rarely needing anything more than that. 

 

They walked out of the commons, and into the entrance hall, steps making as little noise as possible, before Chase stopped at the front suddenly, the cane slipping out of his fingers and onto the hard wooden floor with a clatter. The man at the end of the hall jumped, and froze.

“Shit.” Chase breathed, staring straight ahead. His voice shook, and his hands shook and his breath shook. “Shit, look who it is.” Jackie was looking, and he too had recognised him, though all he saw of him was his back, covered by a long white coat. His heart beat fast and his eyes were wide. Then the man turned, and he felt his knees go weak. He half heard a strangled gasp from Marvin and grabbed his arm to support himself, fingers digging in hard because,  _ fuck _ , it was really him and he was _ right there _ . They all stood, scarsley daring to breath, too scared that it was all a dream to move, that if they took a step he’d vanish like smoke and they’d never see him again, until Chase’s voice finally broke the silence with a choked and disbelieving:   
“Shit!  _ Henrik _ !”

 

The doctor looked, somehow, the same as he had in august, but so, so different too. His hair was its natural coffee brown and was far messier than usual, and his glasses were gone. Aside from that, Schneeplestein looked older. Weariness hung from his form, and he drooped with its weight. He looked thinner, the lines in his face sharper and more sunken. His eyes looked a little too wide, like they were incapable of showing anything but fear again. The muscles in his face twitched from underneath his surgical mask as if he were trying to smile but had forgotten how. 

 

“Oh, ah, Hello, my friends.” he greeted, eyes dancing over the three of them, as if waiting for an attack. Without warning, Chase rushed forwards and threw himself at him, wrapping him in a tight embrace. He buried his face in the doctor’s shoulders and sobbed. Jackie noticed how Schneeplestein flinched, how surprised and confused and oddly uncomfortable he looked, how he seemed unsure where to put his hands. Stepping forwards, he placed one of his own on Chase’s shoulder.

“Chase,” he mumbled. “Let him come in first.” He didn’t miss the grateful look Schneeplestein shot him as Chase untangled himself. He smiled back, gentle and calming, though on the inside he felt like bursting into tears and screaming every question he’d had for the last nine months.  _ Where were you?! What did he do to you?! Why did you have to leave us? _ Instead, he pushed them down for later. “Schneeps.” he said, raking a finger through his hair. “God, I- I honestly can’t believe you’re back. I- We’ve missed you so much.” He blinked away the tears he could feel pricking at his eyes like nettles. “Welcome home. Come on, I think we’re gonna need something to eat.”

 

As they walked back to the commons, Schneeplestein hung back nervously, lost in his own home. He looked tense as if poised to flee at any moment. It broke Jackie’s heart to see the confident, loud doctor so small and unsure. Though it had always been a little big, the doctor’s coat hung off his frame more now, and his shirt baggier. His arms looked stick thin. As Jackie opened the door to the commons, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Schneeplestein freeze. He glanced back to see a fierce, distrusting look on his face.

“Schneep? What’s wrong dude?” Chase prompted softly. The doctor unfroze, snapping around to face Chase, a wild, frightened look in his eyes.

“Who” he shouted, and Jackie suddenly realised what was happening. “Is  _ That _ ?!” He pointed into the commons, breathing uneven.  From his chair by the fire, forgotten in the chaos, Jameson Jackson blinked blearily at the group as he woke.

 

Jameson pushed himself a little more upright before beginning to sign cautiously.

“Hello sir, My name is Jameson Jackson. It’s is a pleasure to meet you I’m sure.” When this was met with a look of incomprehension from the doctor he looked over to Marvin. “Who’s this? Would you mind introducing us?” Marvin nodded, gesturing between the two.

“Schneep, this is Jameson Jackson, or JJ for short. JJ, this is Dr Henrik Von Schneeplestein, Usually known as just Schneeplestein, Scheeps or Schneep.” Jameson’s eyes widened in recognition.

“Goodness!” he signed, a look of confusion on his face. “I thought you said he was dead!” Marvin shrugged.

“Thankfully we were wrong.” Schneeplestein’s eyes darted between the two, suspicion on his face clear. 

“JJ here showed up about two months after you disappeared.” Jackie explained. “He’s mute, so we all started learning sign language to get by. We’re pretty much fluent now I think.” The doctor frowned further, expression a mix of hurt and anger.

“Well.” he replied after a long silence. “I am glad that you have found someone new. To take my place” His voice was bitter and hard, nothing like how Jackie remembered it. In his chair, Jameson bit his lip, hands fidgeting like he wanted to say something but wasn’t sure how. Chase and Marvin exchanged glances, looking as worried as Jackie felt.

“Would you guys maybe give us some alone time here?” he asked. “I’m sorry, I just wanna talk to Schneep privately a sec.” Chase nodded.

“I’ll go make some dinner.” he announced. On any other day in recent months, Jackie would have been overjoyed at this from Chase, but now he only felt gratitude. He hurried out, Marvin and Jameson following behind him.

 

Now it was just Jackie and Schneep.

“Come on,” Jackie said, leading the doctor further into the commons. “Sit down a moment- you look exhausted.” Hesitantly, Schneeplestein lowered himself into his favorite armchair, as if scared it would evaporate from benife him. Jackie pulled over a chair of his own, and sat opposite him. “So.” he began, and stopped. There was silence, thick as syrup, as Jackie struggled for something to say.  _ Where were you?! What did he do to you?! Why did you have to leave us?  _ “I missed you.” he settled on. It sounded lame and meaningless. ‘Missed’ could never convey a fraction of what Jackie felt. “I missed you so fucking much, Schneep. We all did.” he chuckled slightly, shaking his head. “I just can’t believe you’re finally back.” Schneeplestein didn’t meet his eyes, instead looking down at his hands, clasped white in his lap.

 

“You replaced me though.” He finally whispered, almost to himself. His hands trembled visibly, and he flinched as Jackie took them in his own.

“Hey now, that’s not true” he protested softly. “We could never replace you.” Schneep looked up at him sadly.

“You did. You got this new guy, this, this Jackson guy, and you’re back to four in the group. You don’t need me.”

“Doc, that’s the biggest piece of bullshit that’s ever come outta your mouth. You honestly think anyone could replace you?” the doctor opened his mouth, but Jackie cut him off. “And don’t give me any of that ‘we don’t need you’ shit. We’ve-” His voice cracked, and the hero reached up under his mask to rub at his eye, which were threatening to overspill. “We’ve been falling apart since you’ve been gone. I’m not gonna say ‘you don’t know how hard it’s been’ or any of that crap, cause it seems to me that whatever happened to you is worse than anything I could imagine.” Gently, he squeezed the doctor’s hand. “Hey.” he said softly as Schneeplestein turned away. “Henrik, look at me. Obediently, he did so, eye’s haunted and broken. 

“He replaced me.” he whispered, voice horace and tinted with horror. “He took me away, and put an imposter in my chair, and he did so, so much more.” He’d begun shaking, staring wide eyed into some memory. “Oh God, he did so much more…” He trailed off, clearly unable to speak more. Jackie hushed him, rubbing soothing circles on his legs, wishing he could do so much more.

“It’s okay,” He promised. “It’s okay. You don’t need to think about that now. You’re here. You’re safe. It’s okay.”

 

They sat for a little while, listening to Chase clattering around in the kitchen. Schneeplestein sighed slightly, rubbing his face.

“I still do not trust this Jameson. I know you say he is not replacing me, but still. Trust must be won. It should not be given out like is nothing.” Jackie nodded, a sad smile ghosting his face.

“To be honest? We didn’t at the start. But you can’t blame us- he showed up outta the blue on halloween with no name or anything. Do you think any of us are dumb enough to trust that? “   
“But you do.”   
“Well, yeah. We do now. Cause obviously he had nowhere else to go, so we let him stay, but we kept our distance for a few weeks, and just kinda, watched him? He’s probably the most harmless guy I’ve ever met. And trust me, I’ve met quite a few dangerous guys- I’ve got pretty good at recognising them.” His tone became more serious. “But I completely get it if you don’t trust him right now Doc. I know this must be jarring to come home to, but he’s a good guy. Hell, he kept us going these past few months.” The doctor gave a grunt of acknowledgement.

“We shall see.” 

* * *

 

Chase came in soon after, carrying bowls of soup. Schneeplestein had took his gratefully, eyes wide again, though this time in amazement. He glanced between the bowl and Chase, as if he couldn’t believe he was giving it to him. He managed half before placing it down, claiming he was full. Jackie sipped at his own, half watching Chase out of the corner of his eye, silently thrilled to see him eating for once, until Marvin came in, announcing a bath had been run. Schneeplestein dutifully followed him out of the commons. Jackie felt uneasy letting him out of his sight, though logically he knew the magician would let no harm come to him. He and Chase sat, silence filling the room like an over inflated balloon, until the father popped it with a question.

  
“So, what did you say to him?”   
“Not much.” Jackie confessed. “I mostly just told him about JJ. He doesn’t trust him.” Chase let out a half snort, fiddling with the hat in his hands. 

“Yeah, no shit dude. Doc’s been missing, what, nine months? And he comes home to find some new dude’s living there too now. I mean, I wouldn’t trust that.”   
“And something clearly happened to him, you can tell. I dunno what the bitch did to him, but you know it wasn’t anything good. Something went down.”  Jackie interjected. 

“Yeah, right. Basically, I wouldn’t trust anyone if I went on a nine month vacation, all expenses paid for by that son of a bitch. Least of all some new dude who showed up on halloween, of all days. Just sayin’.” The hero nodded dejectedly, and Chase’s voice softened slightly. “Dude, it’s okay, you just gotta give him time. You tell him about Jack?”

“No. it’s… It’s not the right time yet. I mean, he’s only just got back. Give it a few days. I don’t wanna load that on him too right now.” Chase nodded, understanding.

“Well,” he said suddenly. “Speaking of, I should probably go see Jack. Let him know what’s going on.” He chuckled humorlessly. “If he can hear me, that is.” Jackie sighed, all too familiar with the seeds of doubt taking root in Chase’s brain like weeds, choking at hope. He felt their choking tendrils all too often.

“I sure hope he can.” He admitted. “Maybe we’ll get another miracle today.” A small smile crossed his friend’s face. He nodded, and swung the cap back onto his head.

“Yeah, maybe.”

**Author's Note:**

> for a story about Schneeplestein there's quite a lot of jameson here huh? I mean, can you blame me though.


End file.
